Sad and feeling down/ Kanashii

There's a lot of things going on lately... I'm sick. No, I didn't mean mentally, that one is obvious :p. I meant physically. Yah, this is like my first time of total break down. I feel tired, lazy and sick... No fever, just sore-throat, headache, flu, and gingivitis at the same time. And I guess this is the result of all those late night mugging sessions. But I can't help it since night is like my most effective period. Everything seems to just flow into my head at that time. Now I just feel incompetent, worthless and weak. While everyone was cheering and clapping and shouting, all I did was sitting still and stoned. I really hate myself for this.
But I hate that doctor more. The stupid doctor who didn't give me a MC. It's just a note, for heaven's sake. He said that since I did go to school and just didn't run, I don't need a MC. And he refused to issue one but still charged me 5 bucks. I swear if I wasn't so wiped out, I would have argued with him.
Life is weird and unpredictable. After a miraculous event of me tuning into mugger mood and become a hardworking student, I suddenly lost all the motivations for studying. I just study like a machine without even know why I'm doing it. But luckily though, at least I still study :D. But it's been totally strange though. I'm not happy when I score high and I'm not upset when I score low. What kind of attitude is this?
And to add on to this mess, right now I am having this kind of confusion in my head. It's all the feelings fighting each other, a war between relationships...
Whao, this is like the longest entry I have ever posted :D
Okay, here are some radom pictures I took along these weeks

Haha, Lynna's calligraphy is not bad sia :D



And this is my :p - so embrassing :D. But this is my first time writing Chinese what -.-"



Oh yah, these are the basketball player from the Olympic team of China. Gosh, they are tall! Seriously, they look like walking giants. Can they like at least give me some of that height, they need so much for what!



And this one is going to play in NBA next year. He's quite a pro liao.


I think I should just stop writing here, or else I'll get more depressed. Right now, the only things that keep me still happy or look happy are my family, friends and dancing :)